Relationship problems need advice!
 

Ok, i know how dumb this sounds asking for this kind of help in a camaro forum but i figure i will get better advice here. Ok heres the story, I recently started seeing this girl shes cool and all but she is way to clingy, i have done things with her which now i regret badly cause now she wont leave me alone. She considers me her boyfriend which im not never even asked her :banghead: , At first when i met her i thought i liked her but now that i got to know her more i realize i really dont and shes not my type. I may have led her on but not to the point like she takes it. Shes always telling me "you better not leave me" and "your amazing you proofed to me that all guys arent the same" ???? Im like what the hell she really doesnt know me that well...I thought maybe it was just all in my head so tonight i went over to see her thinking its possible that i do like her but after tonight i know now for sure i dont. As i tried to leave her house she wouldnt leave me alone shes always touching me and all that i dont mind some touching but she is constantly touching me! I need to know the best way to tell her i dont like her. Ive tried already i told her i wasnt ready for any kind of relationship hoping that would work but instead she tells me, its ok we will just take it slower :banghead: I just dont have the well what you wanna say the balls to tell her straight out that i dont like her. I know she would be devistated! Ive never been in this kind of situation before, usally ill stick with the girl for a long time. But shes just not my type, please help!

wow dude that sucks though looks like ur either gonna be stuck with her or just tell her straight out, she doesnt seem like the type that will take it any other way, i think the best would be just to tell her straight out soon or it will just keep getting worse and she will probably just get more obsessed, well just my .02, but good luck

Thats what i was afriad of, but i think i got to man up and do it. I just rather not. lol this sucks...

Edit, btw thanks for the advice, it really did help.

I've seen that type of chick before. It's not so much as she's "in love" with you as she's in love with the idea of being in love. She has the feeling that she need's to have a serious relationship so bad as soon as a guy shows any intrest in her she jumps on him and tries to make it more than it really is. The longer it goes on the worse it's going to get and the harder she's going to take it. It's not going to be easy and she's not going to take it lightly but you need to cut it off right now. Don't let it go for a day longer. Don't worry though, as soon as she finds another guy she'll jump on him as well.
My wife had an old bf that was like that. He was telling her he loved her after like three day's of knowing eachother and they hadn't even been on a date or anything.
There's also a girl at my work that I can tell is like that as well.

get the **** outta dodge, she obviously doesn't get the hint, and anything you tell her is going to go through one side and out the other. Girls Can be Incredibly nuts, and she is apparently one of them. i personally would stay as far away from her, don't answer her calls, and don't talk to her, dont make eye contact. because if you come straight out with it, she is going to cry and guess who shes going to try and hug and cry on?? you, beacuse shes crazy, and then your going to end up sleeping with her again and then its all going to start over....

trust me.... girls like this don't understand "no" its like faux-rape.

Yeh well she just called me 3 times, i havnt answerd, i know that i need to brake it off but she makes it so difficult, i should of never slept with her, that was my mistake was thinking with the wrong head. And now she tells me she got me a christmas present. damn thats the last thing i needed to hear. i hate having feelings it blows...

We all make mistakes but leading her on would be wrong. You know he need to break it off, the sooner you do it the better you'll feel.

well im going to brain storm on how to tell her, i wont be easy, and she wont take it lightly, i just hope she doesnt seek revenge.

good luck either way man, who needs ******* when you've got a car as hot as that?

I know it sounds cheesy but when it comes to relationships, honesty is the best policy. Man up and tell her exactly what you wrote in your first post.

I would put my 2 cents in but I don't want to be a bad influence ...lol


p.s.

Most dumb psycho chicks think that if they destroy your nice car they will hurt your game and you will come running back in their arms! So I would park your car for a while and make sure you have a locking gas lid ;)

do what you gotta do ASAP! if she still dont get it, stop returning her calls and hanging out with her. tell her you have other things to do. seriously sometimes you HAVE to be a bit of a dick.

I was so about to say this!!!

Most dumb psycho chicks think that if they destroy your nice car they will hurt your game and you will come running back in their arms! So I would park your car for a while and make sure you have a locking gas lid.

punch her in the ovary.

No, you look at her and tell her your Ex who you had dated for a long time in the past, Died a few days ago.. and you dont want to be in any sort of relation ship... Or LOL, tell her you Gay...








J/k.

yea man tell her ure gay, then make out with her dad...

hahahaha

Paar is right.. bwahahahahaha i love this thread!

seriously though man, Chicks are crazy dated a few... aslong as she isnt underage ure fine bro. Get the sack up n tell her , thats all you can really do. she will be upset, but a day or two of that is better then her driving u ******* crazy.

and/or stay for the presnt n then dip, be a dick, dont get her anything, when she asks why say you had togetsomething for your other girlfriend....

i had some help from a friend who talks to her, i told her to say that im with another girl also, i havnt heard from her since then. Im going to call her today and tell her im sorry for leading her on. And she lives on the other side of town and has no idea where i live (thank god) but she does know where i go to school, so hopefully she wont sweeten my gas tank, i hope not cause she does know if she wanted to get back at me my car would be the best way. She knows i love my car! LOL this thread is funny. tell her im Gay, lol i honestly thought about that...lol but she knows im not so i dont think that will work.. haha ive even tried telling her im into drugs, lol that didnt even work she told me as long as i dont get caught, im like wtf?

Ooh, you are in a difficult position.

There are three ways to break it off... one is to 'drop off the face of the Earth'. Basically you break all ties, all contact, you don't answer her calls, you avoid places she frequents, if she calls your house and you live with your parents or a roommate, they are instructed to ask who is calling, and if it is her, you are not home. If you live by yourself, you unplug your answering machine. That is the coward's way out, and while it's effective, doesn't allow me to give you much respect.

Second way is the 'preferred' (depending on who you are) method. Sit her down and just tell her "Look sweetie, we've had a lot of fun together, and I think you're a really spectacular girl, but things are still moving too quickly, and I'm really not comfortable with getting involved with someone right now. I'm really sorry, I don't think we should see each other on this kind of level anymore." You have to sound as empathetic to her feelings as possible. She'll still be upset, but less so than if you had told her "I don't like you anymore, f-off tramp".

Then there's the FUN way. This is for guys who do not have a conscience... so you can understand why I came up with it.

First off, start doing everything WRONG. She seems to feel as though you're the greatest thing and can do no wrong, well you need to change that ASAP. Start doing the opposite of what you normally do with her.

Second, spend MORE time with her. Why? Because you'll also be doing step one at the same time. With a little effort, her patience will soon start to wear thin and she'll get sick of you.

Third, HIT ON ALL HER FRIENDS. Non-stop. Flirt so much that you might as well take their panties right off in front of her. You need to bury into her brain that you are not committed to anyone.

Fourth, go on dates, then tell her about them... and say "As a friend, I need your advice... how can I tell if this girl I went out with likes me?" You also need to burn into her that she is your FRIEND, not GIRLFRIEND.

Personally, I've grown out of doing #3 because my days of being a prick have come to an end (except when bugging NoRiceInside about having no testicles/wanting to buy a Tiburon, and just harassing Paarman for no good reason). I would go with #2. Burning bridges isn't generally a good idea. And if you have mutual friends, #3 is definitely a "For Advanced Game only" step.

I think im going to use number 2, i think ill even tell her word for word on what you wrote, thanks! Ive already tried number 3, to some extent, i told her everything she didnt want to hear, she was telling me im perfect, i told her im far from perfect, she tells me she wants to get serious, i told her im in now way of getting serious (which is true im in my prime how can I just settle down?) She told me she hates any mind stimulants , i told her im a huge pot head and i even sell pot/cocaine when i get a chance (not true) LOL!!!, then she says she wants to see me more often, i told her i like having my own space, Ive stood her up plenty of times and shes still there clingy. Ive even tried number 1, ive avoided her for days without talking to her, she will just send me millions of messages to my phone. I wont even respond and its like shes talking to her self. Shes not a ugly girl, im sure she wont have a problem getting another guy why she is clingy i dont know. Im no stud, nor do i have a nice piggy bank, sure i have a nice car but shes only seen it once, so i dont think that has to do with anything. Im not proud of it but ive even treated her bad plenty of times, once we were watching tv at her house then she starts to kiss me so i push her away and told her to let me watch tv, she cant take a hint at all. She even told me she loved me a couple times, i told her never to tell me that again because there is no such thing, how can she love me when she doesnt even know me? Why are girls always looking for love? I dont get it every single girl ive ever been with are the same, they are all fogged up trying to find there true love, shes only 18... whats the deal with that? BTW im only 19 for you who dont know.

LOL, So shes kinda the Ditzy Clingly Virgin type? LOL, Ive had woman problems...
Once I was TOLD we were Going Out.. I was Like WTF? NO... then she was like See ya at lunch.. i was like See ya in hell... And lunch came... And she came up to me and was like hey, lets get something to eat... I told her i already had.. and whatever... 3 weeks of this BS later. She got the hint. and now i see her, And im like a ghost.. I see her on the road, i wave.. she doesnt.. Some women man Geeze. PITFA... Its like AHHHHH some Woman can drive a Forever sober man to drink...


Good Luck To you.

ok this is what im going to send her,

tell me what you all think...

Look gorgeous, we've had a lot of fun together, and I think you're a really spectacular girl like no other, but things are still moving too quickly, and I'm really not sure about getting serious with someone right now. I just dont think i could commit, Ive tried but I just cant. I'm really sorry, I don't think we should see each other on this kind of level anymore. I do still want to hang around with you. I just dont know what i want right now. You need someone that will give you the attention you deserve I just dont think I can be that person. I never had any intentions of hurting you i promise thats why ive been saying we need to take it slow I didnt want to get your hopes high. I mean you still have your whole life infront of you why are you looking for love now?

I tried to make it like i was the one with problems, hoping that will soften her up...

good luck homie!
hahaha
"****** her then im im out... "

hahahaha

its been sent... holy ****! wish me luck...

LOL, She'll ignore it.

lol, shes kinda like that all exept for the virgin part :lolsign:

HOLY **** THIS WAS HER RESPONSE This is really starting to get to me!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Ok listen it was my fault not yours i did alot of thinking last night and i saw that i was moving into this way to fast maybe it's cause i didn't want a serious relationship and i didn't want to loose you but i looked and i've just been pushing you away it's my fault i still want this but like you said slowly and this time i'll take it slow i just need to learn to be patient javier i really wanna be with you it was my fault not yours i'm making it go fast and i don't want that anymore we just need to give it a day at a time and i'm sorry i jumped in so quickly again. But ilike you said before i don't want to be without on terms of us not being together. I'll take it slow i swear. Just lets try this again please?

FIRST mistake. You e-mailed her. You CANNOT e-mail a 'break-up' to a clingy girl. You HAVE to do it in person, the power of your tone DOES NOT TRANSLATE through text. You need to balls up and tell her face to face.

SECOND mistake... "I do still want to hang around with you." BAD move. That simply does not work. By saying that, you're giving her hope that there still might be something. Whereas the line prior to it takes everything away without actually saying "Maybe we could be friends". If you have ever had a serious relationship go sour, and tried to 'remain friends', you know it doesn't work right away. You either end up hating each other or f'cking each other and dating all over again. You need a buffer where you do not see each other to let the feelings (or lack thereof) subside . It took me a year and a half to be 'friends' with my ex. We weren't even on speaking terms until then.

You need to see her in person and tell her "You're an awesome girl, but I think we're done dating. Things just haven't been clicking with me, and I don't want to hurt you, but we're kind of past that point, especially for the time that both of us have invested in this." You left a huge door open for her to stick her foot back in with that e-mail, and as a result, made it that much harder to break up with her without feeling like a total dick head. You need to make her know that "No, there's no 'second chance', it's over". Otherwise she'll keep asking for one.

The reason I wrote what I wrote is because it works. You don't fix what ain't broke. You added like six different lines that only make it easier for her to weasel her way back. KISS principle... keep it simple, stupid. Not to mention I told you to 'sit her down' and say it, not 'fire her off an e-mail'.

You're 19, I understand this, you're just only developing your game, but you gotta listen to us veterans. We've been there before, me plenty of times (at age 21, I know it sounds silly but you wouldn't understand if I explained). I wouldn't tell you something to make her come running back to you.

Now go break that girl's heart already.

she just called me, i told her we should stay friends but anything is out of the question. Shes pissed she even hung up on me. o well... i feel bad but yet have this huge relief, thats were i am right now...


TorqueDog, i really do appricate your help, it did help me out alot. Made it clear to me that i have to man up and get myself out of situations that i put myself in. Thanks again man i owe you one...

Like i said ignore her *** untill the end of time.

She'll get over it; like I said, it took my me and my ex a year and a half to even be on speaking terms. So if you are genuinely wanting to be 'friends', you'll be waiting a bit by the sounds of things.

Not a problem pal. Been there before, it sure as hell isn't fun.

Im kinda in that situation now but worse. I dated the girl for a year straight. Shes a great person, but out personalities do not mesh AT ALL. I've broken up with her numerous times, but we have so many mutual friends its hard to just say "Im never seeing you again". Me and her are still close friends and she wants more, and wont give up lol.

I hope yours gets the picture lol.

Phate, find another girl and date her, and make sure the other one sees you with her. That usually slams the door on any 'comeback tours', if you know what I mean.

Of course, that involves FINDING a new girl. Or just 'casually' date one. Unfortunately, this can often backfire if the old girl is the jealous type. Or if the "Economy Principle" comes into play... if your demand is up (both her and the new girl want you) and your supply is down (the new girl has you), then she'll end up wanting you more. So it's a double-edged sword.

There is a science behind understand women. It just takes someone to put it into plain English.

well you know you feel something for her even though its sympathy but your better of telling her now then let it keep going and crushing her later

Kinda like my situation right now.

But like I said, punch her in the ****** ovary. Ill bet shell leave you alone then.

Here is where it gets complicated. Her mom and I are good friends also. And she tells her mother everything. This girl for some reason still thinks we are a 'thing' but when I ask her stuff like "why she has 'in a relationship" on her myspace, she says "just so guys wont keep hitting on me". Shes obcessive, clingy, and worst of all, CRAZILY jealous. When we dated she hated i'd hang out with some of my female friends when she wasnt around. (I have more female friends than male friends actually... alot more)

I have a few people who I know want to date / have a fling with me. I might just pick the best one and have her find out. I just hate drama, and this is gonna cause a ton regardless.

We should have a Sticky, Titled, "Women Problems? Ask James."

LOL, Nice to have some one like ya around James!! LOL Women at the ages of0-20 Can Seem like Toys.... But some of them are loaded... And will Sink Ya.. LOL And some are like the chinesse Finger Traps.. once you put yourself in one.. you aint comin' back out with out a Fight... LOL


BTW, Get a Locking Gas CAP... :)

hahaha sticky fo sho. ive been in the same situation as some of you except i was the other person who didn't realize the girl didn't like me as much as i thought. lol it turned out good actually...she's like one of my best friends now and i can talk to her about anything. now my problem is i like my friends sister....

Just kill her nexttime she comes over.

sounds like we have all been in this situation at one point i know i sure as hell have but luckily right after all the crap i went on vacation to england for 2 months with no contact and that killed it luckily

Me and her are done now. Shes sad but she doesnt hate me, we are staying friends, so i doubt revenge is what she will want, shes still on the nuts but now she doesnt sound as obbsessed, now time to try and get the girl i really do like. hell yes!