tomm

Im sure that all of you had one of those days where you want to end it all. yea well heres mine:
it all started when i was watching my little sister on sunday. she three years old and was sick. so i took her to the hospital. and i was there for so long and she was crying. i felt so sad to see my little sister like that, i had tears coming. and i told my mom that i was at the hospital, and she was mad saying that i wasnt watching her and she prolly ate something bad. and i knew it was just the mother talking but it made me feel so bad. lately ive been missing a few class days here and there because people need my help. and im behind. so monday i decided that i gotta lookout for myself, and was determined to go to class, take my makeup exam, and get back on track. but no. at 7:45am i got a call from my roomy that i hate so much, and i ignored his first two calls, and his third one i finally answered annoyed. and turns out that he was in a car accident and was in a concussion. he fell asleep at the wheel and rolled his car 5 times. luckily he was ok, and nothing happened to him. just a lot of cuts and bruises and one severe concussion. but when he called me he was in shock. and the ambulance took over an hour to find where he was at, on the outskirts of farmington, nm. very confusing if you dont know the place well. easy to get lost. and he kept saying he was ok and wanted to go home. so the cops and emt said it was ok. but when i got home his pains got worse, the numbness went away and since he had no health insurance he wanted to go to the nicer, navajo hospital in shiprock nm, 30 miles away. so i did. and he was ok. waited for about 6 hours. and called my work and instructors, and all said it was ok but that test cannot be made up again. and around 2pm we were going back to farmington nm, and my car broke down. my gauges werent working and i didnt know my car was overheated till later. i recently changed the thermostat and got a new radiator, and a new water pump. but it still overheated thanks to a blown head gasket. and now my car is done, after i got it running again from when someone loosened all my rear lugnuts and they fell off and i had to replace the whole rear end. well i was stranded and calling everyone i knew from shiprock to farmington and sadly no one wanted to help. everyone who i helped greatly had more important things to do like go to lunch or take a shower,. it pissed me off so much that i dropped everything i was doing to help someone i dont like in need, yet my so called friends wouldnt lend a hand when i was in need. well anyways later that day my roomy woke up finally and my other roomate was feeling down, and found out his uncle had died, and was found tied up to a tree, abused. he was a navajo and a witness said it was 3 white guys who did that. well later the one person who means so much to me, alyssa, my friend, the girl i love so much called, and was talking, and i was afraid to talk to her about what happened because i didnt want to worry her. and she accidentally hung up, and i got so mad and yelled at her, and was pretty much for no reason, and i never made her cry, but i think i did now. and now she wont talk to me, and i feel like so much crap. im tired of this. no more car, no more so mcuh. whats the use rights?

whitecamaro96

man that sucks man i no its hard when the people you think are your friends dont care enough to help out when you need it the most but the car can be fixed, im sure your girl friend will realize that you where in a bad mood and will forgive you and every thing will work out jsut keep your head up man

MetalliCamaro

Unreal, That Sounds like one of those days... Where you ask yourself, "Is this a Nightmare? This cannot Be happening..." I know Ive had those before. It seems like you have no control... no matter what you do you always end up in the Shi* Hole.... Hey, Time Will Pass, Things Will get Better, Just gotta Keep your head up..

paarman97maro

yeah man, we all have ****** days, weeks, or months... It can only go up once your at the bottom, so just remember that.. Hope ya feel better about stuff, sorry about the ****** day.

tomm

well i thought things were going to get better but i guess not. well first of all alyssa hasnt talked to me since i got mad. and her phone got tooken away at school and i try to visit her at the dorms at her school but she gets checked out everytime i go there, and usually when her real dad is in town so its that family bonding. i cant blame her if shes mad, but it making me go crazy. i leave a voicemail on her phone nightly to say goodnight and whatnot. My mom was going to let me watch my little sister again, and take her to the navajo nation fair, but we got in another arguement and were not on speaking terms. i wantd to spent that time with my little sister too, her innocence and hapiness can really light up my day. and i wanted to see alyssa so much because just seeing her smile can make my whole day turn a 180. but about my little sister, i got in an arguement with my parents because they promised me a car, and it sounds like im spoiled but im not. because they brought my hopes up so high that i was looking foward to it, since my brothers got a 2001 mustang gt new and a 2002 camaro z28 for their graduation gifts. and me nothing, i had to buy this v6er myself. and now when i was able to get a new one, they shut me down because my dad wanted to trade his 05 chevy dually for a 07 dodge dually. messed up. i was going to buy the 2000 trans am from the fbodys for sale forum. it was so serious that i had the bank ready to finance and whatnot, and i made a deal with my parents that i would pay half and they pay half, and once i had everything settled they said no, and i cant be depending on the all the time, which is stupid to say since i moved out when i was 17, buy my own food, gas, rent, pay for my own repairs, all that good stuff. whereas my two brothers, one 24 and the other 21 both still live at home with mommy and daddy. it gets to me so much that they treat me like crap. i dont know if their doing it to make me more independent and stronger but it seriously stresses me out to the point where i always think that i cud just end my life right now and maybe then theyll realize that what they do to me was too much for me to handle. im the first to move out, first to graduate from a prep school, first to be done with college, but i fail to see the appreciation from my parents, who always brag about wher im at in my life. i was so close to getting that car. i feel like **** now. and i missed work again today. i havent talked or spend time with my little sister, my gf, my car is still broken down, and my phone is about to be shut off. life sucks about now. and to make it worse i feel volurable right now and my ex gf knows, so lately shes been giving me rides and ive been having lunch with her, and i just went with it thinking it was just a friendly thing since were still were good friends. i dont know. im out of here. dont know what ill be doing. so i prolly wont be visiting the site for awhile until i get my priorities straight, so i dont do anything stupid that gambles with my life

ITSA6

take your time get things firgured out things happen for a reason you just gotta figure out why. stay safe good luck

69z-28

dont worry bro. **** happens and you just gotta push through it.

one of my favorite quotes that makes sense to me:
"in the end, everything will be alright. if it's not alright, it's not the end"